America’s Next Bill Clinton!


Sexual harassment victim suspended.

On Friday, I was informed by a friend of mine that one of his students had been suspended for five daysafter SHE was sexual harrassed.

The story goes something like this: in class Friday, when he was teaching Latin, the girl just bursted “I am sick of this shit,” and started crying. He took her outside, and she confided in him that she would “slit his throat and throw him in a ditch.” She went on to inform him that the student in the next seat over had been sexually harrassing her, telling her to “suck [his] dick” among other things …it got worst.

After confirming the information with other students, he wrote up a slip to send the harrasser to the front office for disciplinary actions. But security had already arrived, and took them both to the office.
Come to find out, another school administrator had heard the sexual harssasment victim’s angry comment about throwing her harrasser’s body in a ditch (and she made it in confidence, while angry and crying, TO A TEACHER) and called security.

So, what’s the end result? The girl was suspended for five days for making dead threats, and the guy got two days for being indecent! She also had to apologize to him. Worst part of it all? She is now removed from the class permanently because SHE posed an unhealthy classroom learning environment to him!

Is it just me, or is something extremely backward here? If I got sexually harrassed, you bet your sweet ass I am going to get angry and threaten to kill someone. But I still doesn’t make the harrasser the victim in all of this. WE ALL KNOW WHO THE VICTIM IS!

Furthermore, my friend talked to her and she said she was told that she needed to control HER feelings and not have outbursts. What the fuck? Excuse HER for not remaining prim and proper and “lady like” after being a victim. What’s next? Sending a rape victim to jail instead of the rapist and having her apologize to him for having to fight back? And we’re further reinforcing patriarchy by telling her that all of this is her fault? UGH! It makes me want to pull my hair out.

I really don’t know how we can go about handling this – and am waiting for a call back from my campus director of the Feminist Majority Foundation, but it’s ticking me off.



“Coming out” to my parents

I am on vacation, but I still want to write, simply because I’ve ran across a lot of issues worth talking about, to include a fake “abortion” clinic that I called to find out what they’re about (I’ll blog that later). I also went to a strip club with old friends last night, and hated it. I’ll blog that later, too. For now, this one is about my “coming out.”

Almost two-and-a-half years ago, I came out to my parents. No, it wasn’t the type where at Thanksgiving dinner, I announced that I liked penises now, as my dad choked on the turkey breast (what else would he be eating, right?) and my mon slowly fainted, her face in the bowl of gravy.

My coming was a different sort. I announced to them that I had declared myself a women’s studies major, and now a feminist.

I think they took it quite well. In fact, they probably saw it as a phase, one that would pass. My dad, in his sense of humor, would introduce me to the neighbors as “Marc, our daughter.”

Coming home and seeing them now, though, it’s a little different. They’re beginning to realize that I am in this movement for good.

When I told them that I would be getting out of the Army, finishing up my degree and then going to law school to be an attorney in women’s and human rights issues before trying to go into politics, their first question was how I would make money.

“Why don’t you stay in the Army for 20 years and retire to collect paycheck? You’ll only be 37 by then,” my mom pressed.

“Mom, because women’s rights can’t wait. I want to make a difference,” I replied.

They still don’t get it. They worry about money and how I’d make a living, even after I’d told them that so long as I have a roof over my head and a few nice suits to go to work in, I’d be happy. They don’t get it.

I love my parents, but they want me to do things that don’t matter to me. My calling is feminism and progressive politics. My parents envisioned I’d be a doctor or a hot-shot attorney. This time, they’d even offer to start a business for me.

“What change in the world would I make?” I asked them.

“What girl would marry a man with no money, working for a non-profit as an attorney?” my mom asked.

“Mom, women aren’t gold-diggers, and they’re capable of making money on their own. Besides, I’ve got plenty of admirers who’d want to date me. It’s okay, I don’t need money to get laid.”

They’re unhappy, but I am not going to change my life and my passion around for them. I love my parents, but I love my country more. I want to make my parents happy, but there are millions of my fellow human beings who are still being marginalized based on the sex into which they were born. They take priority.

They gave me life and I am thankful for that. But now, I will use my life to change lives. I am not going to sit around doing my best to make them happy. After all, life is a gift. When you give someone a gift, you shouldn’t expect them to do with it what you want. It’s THEIR gift.



On your period? Ewww, you sick

Sorry if the paragraphs aren’t broken up. For some reason, it’s not doing that, and I’ve tried to fix it, but it doesn’t work. So I gave up. 

Are you on your period? Do you naturally bleed each month? Are you a woman? What shame! My God – you should be hiding the fact that your body naturally secretes blood every month because, like, it just grosses us out, hmmmkay? 

This is the message you’d be getting if you buy into this shit http://www.simplydiscrete.com/ 

It’s essentially a little box thing that women can put their tampons in so that they’d hide the fact their on their periods, so that, according to the vendor, if they’re over at their in-laws house, they can change their tampons discretely.

I actually first spotted this product a few weeks ago at the NOW conference in Detroit and it kind of ticked me off. So I played football with the box, which many fellow feminists thought was kind of amusing.

Here’s the thing: I’ve never had a period, I don’t plan on having one anytime soon – and up until last week, I didn’t even know the mechanics of tampons and pads, and the difference between the two.

But I know this: I am not comfortable with the idea that they’re selling a product and making money off women by encouraging them to “hide” what is most natural.

So they bleed every month. So what? They’re supposed to hide this, why? Why are we still taking steps to make women feel ashamed of what’s natural to their bodies?

And this idiot had the bright idea to sell them at the feminist conference!

Secondly, over at a feminist blog, there is talk of new scented underwear that’s coming out. Apparently, the idea behind this all is that women are supposed to smell like flowers (and melons!) because any other would be unnatural.

In fact, I’ve learned that such a product doesn’t provide for much comfort, either, and can create more infections and Urinary Tract Infections.

So, again, why are we shaming women into buying things to make their bodies unnatural and into what we want? This is consumerism and sexism at its best.

And not to be crude – but goddamn, if a vagina looks and tastes like 1800flowers.com just delivered it to my door, I ain’t touching it. Sorry.



What’s in a name? Pro-feminist males or simply feminists?

So, I wanted to write about the misogynistic and patriarchal idea of how some claim two people of different genders can’t “just be friends,” because there’d be too much sexual attractions, but instead, I’ll write about something a poster asked of me last night: why I call myself a pro-feminist male rather than a feminist.

The value of this post is not about activism, but rather, feminist theory. I’d like to know what you think on it.

 So, the following are the reasons I call myself a pro-feminist male.

1) The feminist movement has been and was created for and by women.  For me to call something that was created for the purpose of women’s rights my own is the very definition of patriarchy – and I have a big problem with that. While I can be an ally and a suppoter, I’ll never, ever truly know what the female plight is like. It seems if I were to call myself a feminist, it would trivialize the importance of women’s rights.

 2) To own and have possesion to something is to have power. Thus, the feminist movement empowers women. As pro-feminist males, we’re always encouraged to give up our male privileges (at least birth-right/unjustified privileges anyhow). By taking the feminist movement as our own, all we’re doing is holding on to those privileges, and gaining from them.

3) In the end, all of these are merely semantics, but I believe we must highlight the differences in privilege that we have. Even within the feminist movement, there are differences in class and privilege – often based on race, gender, age and areas of focus. While I might just be able to say that I am simply a feminist, I am not. I get more privilege as a male, no matter  how we slice it. To merely call myself a feminist would mean to reject that fact that I am still privileged for being male.

 Often times, those who are privileged don’t feel the need to recognize or acknowlege such differences, because they aren’t being treated any differently or aren’t losing perks because of the differences. But for me, as a pro-feminist male, to think that we are all one, and are treated the same, is to be irresponsible.

When I look in the mirror, I may see “just a person,” but women are still looked at as women, and with that, comes limitations cast on by society (whether we like it or not and how much we hate it, we are gendered by society because we’ve been trained to be that way.) This is merely a way to highlight and remember that, so we don’t lose sight of what feminism truly is about.
Thoughts?

Marc