America’s Next Bill Clinton!


Sex toys for $10,000????!?!?

Over at Jessica Valenti’s feministing.com, a discussion regarding Charlie Sheen and Real Life dolls are taking place – and I couldn’t help but do it as well. 

I found this both amusing and a little creepy – so I thought I’d share it, since it is Friday and things ought to be lighthearted.

Now, I am all for sex aide or sex toys or whatever you want to use to enhance your sex lives, but this is pretty weird (www.realdoll.com). It’s a life-size doll made of silicon and latex and crap that feels real, and is used as sex partners for (mostly men) who otherwise wouldn’t be getting any action.

It comes with a built-in skeleton as to allow the owner to put it into any position desired. There’s also an MP3 player that’ll make the doll moan and such …I guess in this case, the only “button” to push to turn her on is …well, the “on” button. It also comes with a heating system that’ll bring the doll’s temperature up to 98.6 degrees.

The intent of this, for many men, of course is to get the perfect partner without having to do the leg work. It’s all the “sex” you want without ever hearing no, or having to hear her talk or negotiate mutually pleasurable activities.

Nevermind the fact that every person has some sort of a short-coming and no one is perfect. In this fantasy world for these men, women will behave whoever they want, look as good as they want, without any of the reality of what a woman really is.

As one man says of the dolls: “For the most part, it’s just like sex with an organic woman…who doesn’t say anything and is brimful of Quaaludes.” I don’t know what the rest of the quote meant, but one can stop after the word “anything” and know what kinds of people these men are.

But it gets worst! Some of these dolls are made into the shapes of teenagers or sometimes even younger. What’s going to be included in the MP3 player, a soundbite of the doll singing the Barney song?

From a feminist perspective, it’s probably a good thing, because so long as they have their robotic lovers, these men won’t be going out and trying to mate with women. Results? No babies! Honestly, because people like these shouldn’t be raising kids.

Another point, too, is that this quite effectively ends the debate of whether women are golddiggers and will only have sex with rich men. If these guys are shelling out $10,000 for a doll, they’re pretty rich, okay? So, why are they having to buy a doll instead of just courting one of those “golddiggers?” Oh, yeah, because golddigers don’t exist – only men using that idea as an excuse for not getting laid.

Thoughts?



Republicans: for the love of blowjobs

bathroom_stall.jpgOkay, first of all, is “blow job” one or two words? I’ve seen both versions. Can I get an English major to help me out here?

And secondly, add Sen. Larry Craig (R-ID) to the long list of Republican politicians who have gone down – and almost literally, for sexual misconducts. According to CNN reports, Craig was arrested early June (and this has now just came out, but don’t expect Craig to do the same anytime soon) at a Minneapolis Airport for attempt of lewd act in the airport’s bathroom. Story is here: http://idahostatesman.com/eyepiece/story/143517.html

Does anyone want to tell me what’s going on here? Craig is the third Republican this summer to have been arrested for sexual misconduct in public places. Worst yet, all three of these politicians (and don’t forget David Vitter of Louisinana who was named in the DC Madam case, too) were involved in SAME SEX acts.

All three have track records of speaking out, and quite passionately, against homosexuality or even sexuality in general. I guess if you spend your entire life fighting against something, it kind of “grows” on you, or you “grow” on the idea, and the next thing you know, you’re doing it.

But being a Republican politician, you don’t want to use your privilege for sex, as you are very moral, so you try to solicit sex in public bathrooms, or go down on an unsuspecting guest sleeping at your house, instead, as national Young Republican Chair Glenn Murphy (http://www.news-tribune.net/breakingnews/local_story_219210228.html) did this summer. So, we’ve got David Vitter who visited a prostitute. Bob Allen who offered a cop money to give the cop a blow job, Larry Craig who made a pass in a public bathroom at a police officer who was undercover (and apparently on the toilet) and Murphy, who decided that the best part of waking up, for a Republican, is with a cock in your mouth.

So focused on blowjobs, these Republicans are failing to do their jobs, and that’s not a good thing – at least for Republicans anyway. Is it It seems Republicans are either on vacation at their ranch or in the bathroom or some other shady places looking for a quick BJ. True?

I can’t help but laugh about it, but at the same time, it makes me wonder about people who are so “moral” and “ethical” about sexual issues, yet are so …depraved (and deprived) for sex. But, hey, political capital is political capital. As a Democrat, I’d take it however I can. How about the Republican Party start a social network just for gay Republican politicians. It’ll be as sort of a facebook type thing. If one Republican felt a need for let off a little steam (and we all do now and then), he can just log on to GOP (Gay Officials and Politicians) and “poke” another Republican he has his eyes and possibly mouth on.

If the guy feels the same way, he pokes back, and they can meet in some Congressional bathroom, specially designated for Republicans, and do all the poking their long-neglected little Republican bodies desire. That would help with a lot of the problems they’re facing. Besides, blowjobs are greatly appreciated and all, but would you want to get one from a bathroom looking like this? Ewww!

In fact, I think Ted Haggard can be their chairman.And you know what, if push comes to shove, they could always go to a private prostitute-for-hire. I here some guy named Roberto is out of a job.Thoughts?



Scientists: only human females can get pregnant

It’s my intention that on Fridays, blogs will be light-hearted, yet still dealing with feminist issues. This here, then, is the first light-hearted post. It’s an article I wrote a few months back while in the shower. 

 NORFOLK. Va. – A 10-year study on human sexuality and reproduction showed that in the human species, 100 percent of those who get pregnant are women, while the percentage of pregnant men remains at zero, scientists from the National Organization for Scientific and Health Institute Technology announced Thursday.

Although the result of the study had always been widely speculated and believed by the majority of the population, NOSHIT leading scientist, Dr. Henry Anderson said the organization set out to do the study to prove conclusively that pregnancy is an ability inherently connected with the female gender, and  males have very little to do with the carrying and birthing of the fetus.

“While there were certainly no disagreements in the scientific community that this was how human sexuality and reproduction worked, there were many organizations that showed characteristics of resisting such a belief,” Anderson said. “So we set out to prove it once and for all.”

The result came from a 10-year study, spanning across five continents that consisted of both field and clinical studies of more than a million couples of child-bearing age. In every case, regardless of whether the pregnancies were planned or a surprise, the pregnancy was carried out by the female half of the couple.

While the results won’t change any contemporary findings in the scientific community, both the religious and political communities are reacting with passionate responses.

“This proves that we’ve always tried to tell the world – that the responsibility and privileges of pregnancy belong to women,” said National Organization for Women president Kim Gandy. “Because of that, the choice of whether to carry out or terminate the pregnancy also belongs to women.”

Gandy went on to point out that while 100 percent of those getting pregnant will always be women, legislatures who make laws regarding a woman’s ability to make decisions about her own body are mostly men.

“Even with the current Congress, 77 percent of those making decisions about reproduction are men,” she said. “There’s a discrepancy, and we hope to change that.”

Armed with the new scientific findings, Gandy said she hopes to work with legislatures and local communities to ensure the reproductive choices of women remain in the hands of those to whom they matter most – women.

Not everyone, however, reacted to the findings with opened arms. Long-time science-denier and televangelist Pat Robertson, speaking at a prayer breakfast in front of a group of Biblical Science students at Regent University, said he is still skeptical about the study.

“Science has done many great things for the world,” Robertson said. “But it’s also created the atomic bomb, gas chambers and tanks and other weapons, all of which have caused pain and sufferings to God’s children.

“I see this finding as being similar to the creation of those weapons. It’s using something that is inherently good to do evil – by that I mean the mass murders of millions of God’s children each year.”

 “To make such a bold proclaimation is to mean that rather than being humbled as we ought to be, we’re being prideful stating we know how God works, and that we know more than God. That leads to a society’s downfall.”

Along with Robertson and other religious organizations, the Christian Wives of America has also spoken regarding the findings.

“I don’t see what it proves,” said CWA president Bertha Green. “The fact of the matter is that we marry through the grace of God, and become one; so because of that, my body is my husband’s body, thus he will always have a say over what I do with my body and the choices I make.”

The mentality of those sharing Green’s belief, said Marc Lloyed, Feminist Majority Leadership Alliance of ODU’s, is the reason the battles for women’s rights continued to be take a step backward.

“It’s not a matter of politics, and it’s not a matter of religion,” Lloyed said. “It’s matter of what’s logical – the logic here is this: you can’t make decisions on what doesn’t belong to you.

“It astounds me how some women are still letting the men in their lives make decisions about their bodies. It makes about as much sense as letting a stranger decide who you’re going to marry or what you’re going to name your kid.”

What concerns him even more, the long-time ally in the women’s rights movement said, is that there are men who, despite the study, still think it’s their rights to make decisions about women’s reproductive choices.

“That line of thinking is as silly as going into another country, taking down its government and telling its people what kind of government they really want,” he continued. “Perhaps we also need to do a study that will find that Americans aren’t Iraqis and don’t know what Iraqis think.”

The findings are expected to bring about months of fighting between the left and right, and although it probably won’t settle anything permanently, will restart the debate between America’s pro-choice and-life.

“We’re ready,” Robertson said. “The feminist movement is the lifeblood of the AntiChrist. We’ve always had God on our side, and this time it won’t be any different. Science may be to answer certain questions, but it’ll never be able to answer how God came about. For my money – and I have lots of it, I’ll always pick God over science.”